I could see the Lady Mountains through the Lady Garden

Today’s words are a more delicate alternative to describe female anatomy bits that are often described in quite unattractive ways. E.g. “great tits love” is not charming nor amusing. So without further ado…..

Lady Mountains – female mammary glands obviously of a larger size or else they would be called “lady monadnocks or hills”.

Hey, you have great lady mountains” is so much more appealing.

The Lady Garden:
There appears to be regular debate amongst the masses as to the state of ones pubic hair arrangements. The people one might least expect often have a Brazilian – and then to actually see a really hairy muff is horrifying because we have all grown accustomed to the tidy tuft.

I have friends who offer the Brazilian as part of their beauty services and word is that some lassies don’t pay much heed to the personal hygiene in the Gunter region. I would have been OK not knowing that but seeing as i was scarred by the visuals that sprung to mind, best i share it around.

Personally, I vote for the landing strip. Tidy, still looks like an adults pudenda, shows you could be bothered but aren’t fixated on it and doesn’t get in the way. In the interests of the public information however i have included the full scope of potential pubic hair options.

Lady Garden – the female pubic hair covering the the mons pubis (Latin for “pubic mound”), also known as the mons veneris (Latin, mound of Venus) or simply the mons.

One quite likes to tend ones lady garden.” There are even shavers available with stencils to landscape ones lady garden if one is not up for the agony that is waxing.

for a whole website devoted to this topic you can visit here.

Styles include but obviously are not limited to:

The Natural/Bush – no trimming and/or maintenance
Trimmed -hair length is shortened but not removed or shaped
Triangle -hair removed (generally waxed) from the sides to form a triangle so that pubic hair cannot be seen while wearing swimwear. This can range from the very edge of the “bikini line” to up to an inch reduction on either side. Hair length can be from an inch and a half to half an inch
Landing strip-hair sharply removed from the sides to form a long centered vertical rectangle, hair length about quarter of an inch
“Hitler” mustache-a shorter, square version of the landing strip
Brazilian waxing/G-wax – pubic hair completely removed except for a very thin remnant, centered, narrow stripe above the vulva approximately an inch in height, and the hair length in the sub-centimeter range
Full-Brazilian/Hollywood/Bare/Bald Beaver-Pubic hair completely removed
Fauxhawk – hair is styled in Mohawk fashion without shaving the hair
Mohawk – shaving the hair on the left and right, leaving the middle to be spiked
Dyed hair -coloring pubic hair to match hair on the head or to give it a unique look (for example, red–in the shape of a heart)
The Butch/The Bull -trimming all the hair very short except for a small perpetual long patch(AKA rattail) resembling a popular hairstyle among lesbian women.
Others :
heart-shaped, arrow, initials, etc. These are usually variations of the Brazilian/G-wax, where a design is formed of the pubic hair above completely bare vulva. A controversial Gucci commercial included female pubic hair shaved into a “G.” refer wikipedia

There is nothing more daunting than the “muff fluff” peeking out of ones swimmers unexpectedly so I hope you have been inspired to get out your garden shears for a spring tidy up.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s